The Marriage Interpreter [No. 36]

 
 
 

 
 
 


THE HUSBAND is walking past Bluebird’s office.
 
The Husband: I only eat foods that rhyme with the word “Gymboree.”
 
Bluebird: Oh… wow.
 
 

***

 
 

The Husband is slapping his own hips.
 
Bluebird: What the—?
 
The Husband: Hip bongos!
 
Bluebird: I give up.
 
 

***

 
 

THE HUSBAND is cutting onions in the kitchen again.
 
The Husband: Is passionado* a word?
 
Bluebird: No.
 
The Husband: Passioneer?
 
Bluebird: No.
 
The Husband: BANJO!
 
(Bluebird stares at him hard. The Husband shrugs.)
 
 

***

 
 

THE HUSBAND just walked into Bluebird’s office.
 
The Husband: I have to read a story by Jorge Luis Borges for one of my classes.
 
Bluebird: (Not paying attention.) Uh huh?
 
The Husband: It’s a long story. It’s a smörgåsbord of Borges. A smörgås-Borges.
 
Bluebird: You really are… something else.
 
 
 

*An astute friend of mine pointed out that apassionato is a word. That means The Husband was only a banjo away from a right answer.

About Courtenay Bluebird (Bluebird Blvd.)

Courtenay Bluebird is the creator of Bluebird Blvd. and The Bluebird B-Side. She is a published writer, career journalist, and professional photographer who likes books and sweets. She laughs loudly and sincerely both in public and in private.
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7 Comments

  1. He is funny <3 Really enjoyed that. hahaaha

  2. Well I’ll be a monkey’s uncle. A dance party and an interpretive reading all in one day. That was a good one. Ask hubby what JLB story he is going to read. I am in love with Jorge but don’t think much of Maria K. Jorge and di Giovanni made a good pair.
    Got to run now. Still looking for those white spats, and a cane, yes, I think I had a cane also (for percussion effect on the floor you know).

  3. Hip bongos are a thing somewhere. In some quantum reality.

  4. -giggles- smörgås-Borges!!!!

  5. Hilarious man! I would play the hip bongos if it would get rid of the extra lard there.

  6. I have hip bass drums. My hips can dance all by themselves. (Thanksgiving. Ooof.)

Hey there, cupcake! How are ya?

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